The NFL vs My Bank Account: Week 9

Total money wagered: $67.25
Potential winnings: $60.00

The picks (in bold):

1. Jacksonville +7.5 @ Kansas City $16.50 to win $15.00
Jacksonville has been getting crushed. Tennessee beat them by 100 points and KC has comparable defense with better offense, not to mention Andy “I Am The Walrus” Reid. I didn’t even need to look at the spread on this one.

2. Detroit +6.5 @ Minnesota: $10.50 to win $11.00
Not ultra confident about this one, but if Stafford can light it up for at least a quarter or two and Detroit can do what the Eagles and Bears did to the Vikings’ injury stricken O-line, I love ’em getting almost a touchdown.

3. Denver pick ’em @ Oakland: $26.25 to win $25.00
Carr is the man, and has served me well this year, but I just don’t think he’s quite good enough to beat that Denver D outright. If they were getting any points I’d consider the Raiders, but I like the Broncos to take this one in my kinda sorta lock of the week.

4. Philadelphia +3 @ New York Football Giants: $14.00 to win $10.00
Reallllly feels like a trap, but I can’t stay away from a potential constant-scrambling Eli at the hands of the Eagles top 5 if not top 3 D line. Phili is legit this year, and hungry as they may be, I can’t say the same for NY.

5. Pittsburgh +2.5 @ Baltimore
Don’t have the option to bet on this game on any of my sites, but I like this game a lot and will throw down on the Steelers if it becomes available for me closer to kickoff. With or without Big Ben, Pittsburgh has looked pretty good. Their defense is porous, but their offensive weapons can guarantee them quite a few points against the Ravens’ less than stellar D.

 

I don’t like this week much at all as you can tell by my wagers. So many of these lines feel like Vegas traps and I just need the weekly lock of the Patriots to get me cocky. Lots of solid games which often means not solid betting games. We’ll see tomorrow.

 

 

 

Nick Buccola

Highlight of the Night: Anthony Rizzo Instinctually Pockets the Game Ball

Did ya catch it? Seamless. Instinctual. Love it.

Everyone is talking about Kris Bryant smiling during this out, but I’m talking about this. Look back at KB’s highlights. That non-alcoholic weirdo smiles every time. But what you don’t see is a giant child at first base having the composure to not throw the ball into the stratosphere out of excitement. Huge play Rizz, congrats to the Cubbies.

 

 

 

Nick Buccola

The Cleveland Indians’ Wishlist for Tonight

This winner take all game is about to be nuts, that much we know. But we really don’t know how it will go down. Here’s what the Cleveland Racists are hoping for.

  • Kluber Klobbers the Cubs again. He hits spots, works that Wiffle curveball to eliminate the threat of the meat of the Cubs lineup — Schwarber through Zobrist — and go 5-6 scoreless.
  • The lineup sees a lot of pitches out of Hendricks and stays patient on his breaking stuff. The quicker the Indians can make this a bullpen match, the quicker they’ll secure a victory.
  • Run, run, run. Especially if Lester comes in. The Cubs are pretty easy to steal bases from, and the more Francona tries to, the less at ease Chicago’s pitchers will be.
  • Hit Chapman in his first inning. When Maddon tries another 20 out save, if Believeland can get at least two runners on, that plan will look all the more flimsy.

If the Indians go out and do their job, do what they’ve done all postseason, they should win this one. On any given night Corey Kluber is the filthiest pitcher in the league, all he has to do is be himself till it’s time to turn it over to their unhittable pen.

 

 

Cubs wishlist will be up before gametime

 

 

 

 

Nick Buccola

The NFL vs My Bank Account: Week 8 Results

Week 7 Record: 3-4-1

Net Earnings: -$1.63

1. Jacksonville +3 @ Tennessee $22 to win $20.00 – Win

2. Detroit +2 @ Houston: $17.55 to win $16.00 – Loss

3. Oakland pick ’em @ Tampa Bay: $11.00 to win $10.00 – Win

4. New York Jets -3 @ Cleveland: $44.05 to win $41.00 – Push

5. Minnesota -6 @ Chicago: $11.45 to win $11.00 – Loss

6. Washington +3 @ Cincinnati (in cheery old London town): $11.00 to win $10.00 – Loss

7. New England -6.5 @ Buffalo: $10.00 to win $9.52 – Win

8. Arizona +2 @ Carolina: $1.15 to win $1.00 – Loss

What I’ve learned: I can’t mess with Houston, may have to ease up on AZ, I need to bet the house on Tom Brady every week, the Vikings could be on their way down, Jacksonville SUCKS, Derek Carr don’t lose, and in Europe, the law dictates all sporting events must end in ties. Not my best week, but certainly not my worst. My winning percentage is 61% and I’m still in the black. For now…

 

Season Record: 10-6-2

Season Earnings: +54.87

Okay, Off to the Glue Factory with Bill Murray Right?

There was a window of time during which it was funny that Bill Murray’s old but whoa! He acts young. And I think after singing Take Me Out to the Ball Game like Daffy Duck, fake lisp, spitting all over the mic and all just now, it’s safe to say that window is slammed shut.

Just an uproar of nervous collar tugging sympathy laughs.

That was so uncomfortable Bill, please give it up. It’s so sad to see someone who was so funny try so hard. So, so, so hard. The funny old guy thing is over, we gotta move on. I’m not saying die, but go out somehow before you hit rock bottom.

 

 

 

Nick Buccola

Watch This Canadian Guy in the World Series of Poker Throw a Massive Bitchfit

This just made poker go from moderately watchable to must-watch.

When Benger (in the Blue Jays hat) lost his shit, Kassouf became my favorite poker player in the world (not that I had a favorite before). If you get a guy to almost cry, yell “check your privilege” and “you’re verbally abusing me,” you’re my kind of poker player. I almost cried myself when he ended up losing with pocket cowboys. Either way, watching these nerds rattle each other is sensational.

 

 

 

Nick Buccola