Turn on the Packer’s Game Right Now, This Fat Guy Won’t Stop Hurdling People

Everything about Eddy Lacy is ABSURD right now. He is listed at 230 which is either a great joke, a typo or — most likely — a Green Bay thing. They probably just take off 25 pounds from every scale in Wisconsin to even things out a bit. I think the air there just makes you fatter.

Regardless, clocking in at what I’m gonna call about 255, somehow Lacy’s best move today has been the hurdle. It’s like Aroldis Chapman throwing a 40 MPH change up. It is one of the most jarring things I’ve ever seen in sports; he’s hurdled three guys already. It’s fucking hysterical, and we’ve gotten plenty of what has to be one of the top 5, top 5, top 5 announcer calls in sports: “BIG BOY!!” Love it. Any time a lineman picks a ball off or Eddy Lacy or LeGarrette Blount does something athletic.

We are all blown away by the score, but I legitimately think this has to be a mirage. This is like one of the fatter people you know — or if you live in Wisconsin, the guy you all call “slim” — just leaping like half his height over athletic defenders. It makes no sense, but it’s the only positive for the Packers so far.

Flip it on and hope along with me to see a fourth magic trick.

 

 

 

Nick Buccola

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